After nearly 23 years as a weight loss coach I have heard every reason why women gain weight, but if we look beyond the superficial, it always comes back to how we feel about ourselves, our life, and our level of self-love. I shared this with you in this weeks vlog, if you missed it you can view it here.
If you truly love yourself, you don’t self-sabotage, or eat food you know is bad for you, so the issue is never with ‘food’, food is just a manifestation of other issues in our life. Through healing our life we can solve our weight problems for good.
I want you to ask yourself a question: do you want to feel good about yourself, would you like to even love yourself? Do you want to feel worthy of an amazing life? If you struggled to answer yes it is time to explore why.
Reflecting in ‘why’ is a very powerful exercise. I asked you write down 20 compelling reasons for losing weight earlier in this series so if you haven’t done so try that now. Then I asked you to write down 20 compelling reasons NOT to lose weight and within those answers lies your ‘why’. The ‘why aren’t I losing weight, or ever keep it off’.
You may have to look beyond what you have written down if the why is buried deep inside you. For example, we never struggle with weight ‘because we love bad food’, we struggle with weight because bad food is giving us something we are not getting elsewhere, like comfort, or security, variety, or even love and connection.
The ‘why’ could be a lack of self-worth, or confidence, or guilt over some past transgression, but whatever your ‘why’ it truly is the key to solving the mystery of yo-yo dieting, if you can solve this mystery then the rest becomes easy.
Weight loss itself exposes our vulnerability because as we lose weight we are forced to confront the pain that we have suppressed and buried underneath our layers of weight. What I am saying is that if you are an emotional eater, you can’t avoid healing your life if you really want to lose weight for good.
It’s vital that you understand weight loss is never just about weight loss, it is always about healing your life and as you work through those areas of unresolved grief or pain from the past. It presents an opportunity to heal these areas, authentically heal them and reframing your internal stories around them so they serve you instead of undermining you.
You will be amazed to discover that as you do this healing work your relationship with food naturally starts improving.
This might all sound like too much, but it’s not. It’s simple, just take a snapshot of your life and determine what you are happy about and what needs work, gather your supporters and the knowledge you need and start healing and start one area at a time.
But I want you to be kind to yourself during this process. We are a society of goal setters. We are taught to set goals and try and achieve them and feel miserable when we don’t. This is not another excuse to beat ourselves up.
Remember that weight loss is actually a journey of inner alchemy and that as you begin to heal your life, the weight loss will just happen and it will stay off.
PS You can catch my short video on this right here!